Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Where are you in this picture?

Photo from Rita Willaert's Flickr site.

I study these photos each day to try to understand what our child will have lost. I look and I look and I look and still, what will I be able to tell this little boy or girl who comes to us? You come from beauty. You come from love. You come from a neighborhood. You come from a home. Your parents, your grandparents, your aunts and uncles and neighbors, they all loved you. They all miss you. They all remember you. I look at this picture and I see neighbors I might know with their children standing as we do in line at the co op or coffee house. I see the children laughing and goofing around, happy and looking up at the adults to see who is watching them. I almost always find myself. Here in this photo I am wearing a black scarf on my head that has a white diamond pattern. I have my hand on my son's shoulder and he is leaning in to me and looking up and smiling and if you look you can just barely see that I am smiling too down at him in happiness and wonder. And there I might be if fate had not put me here. I might be standing in line in Ethiopia. I wish everyone well in this photo. They are so beautiful. I am in awe.

6 comments:

Tracey said...

I am going to have to stop reading your blog. You make me cry too often. I only forgive you because you are so kind and eloquent to people on the big ethiopia group that are completely selfish idiots.

kn said...

If I am going to be crying as often as I do then I want everyone crying!

No no no I don't mean it.

Next post will make you laugh. It's Quinn's comments on our adoption plans.

Hope your holiday was lovely.

Jen said...

Beautiful picture. You articulated what I have been thinking for a while. Well said.

Anna said...

The picture is beautiful.
As much as my son may have gained, I often wonder about all the things he has lost...

Robyn said...

You are incredibly gifted as a writer! Very powerful words indeed! "And there I might be if fate had not put me here." I have had this thought so many times! Your blog is fabulous!

kn said...

Thanks for your kind words. I was so happy to find your blog and a kindred spirit.

Nice to be able to follow so many journeys as they happen.

k